Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Observations on eating out
These observations were inspired by our visit last night to a very fancy restaurant that will not be named because if (a) anybody actually reads this and (b) I were to name them, they would surely sue me out of existance (which wouldn't take much, at present).
No amount of french fries, regardless of quality, is worth $8. Bad french fries are not worth any money at all. Serving the french fries is a bizarre way, such as in a wire funnel, does not make them taste any better or make them worth more.
If in your restaurant kitchen you drop a 50-pound sack of salt so that everything - french fries, green salad, even the bread - becomes coated in too much salt to eat, you should close the restaurant until you can clean up and make edible food. Really, edible food is a pretty important feature of a restaurant.
You should never be scared of your ketchup.
All meat should be cooked. Despite what some people think, fish is meat. Meat is anything that at one time had eyes and moved around of its own accord. If you're going to eat something like that, you should cook it first, and waving it vaguely near some flame does not count. It needs to be cooked all the way through. If I wanted to eat raw food, I would go to a supermarket, which is full of raw food. The point of going to a restaurant is to get the cooking. Especially the meat. But basically, if you're serving food that is not (1) fruit, (2) breakfast cereal, or (3) ice cream, cook it!
My values in some very fundamental way are definitely middle class.
No amount of french fries, regardless of quality, is worth $8. Bad french fries are not worth any money at all. Serving the french fries is a bizarre way, such as in a wire funnel, does not make them taste any better or make them worth more.
If in your restaurant kitchen you drop a 50-pound sack of salt so that everything - french fries, green salad, even the bread - becomes coated in too much salt to eat, you should close the restaurant until you can clean up and make edible food. Really, edible food is a pretty important feature of a restaurant.
You should never be scared of your ketchup.
All meat should be cooked. Despite what some people think, fish is meat. Meat is anything that at one time had eyes and moved around of its own accord. If you're going to eat something like that, you should cook it first, and waving it vaguely near some flame does not count. It needs to be cooked all the way through. If I wanted to eat raw food, I would go to a supermarket, which is full of raw food. The point of going to a restaurant is to get the cooking. Especially the meat. But basically, if you're serving food that is not (1) fruit, (2) breakfast cereal, or (3) ice cream, cook it!
My values in some very fundamental way are definitely middle class.
Labels: food, restaurant, satire
Comments:
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I definitely agree about the french fries and the meat. You'd think at expensive restaurants you'd get food that deserves that kind of price that is, like you said, edible.
Don't worry, Carl. I won't sue you. At least not for this post anyway.
-JQ
Don't worry, Carl. I won't sue you. At least not for this post anyway.
-JQ
# posted by 
: 1:04 PM
: 1:04 PM
LOL. This is hilarious.
I have found that greasy spoons or hole-in-the-walls often provide the best food for the cheapest price.
Lo
I have found that greasy spoons or hole-in-the-walls often provide the best food for the cheapest price.
Lo
# posted by : 6:32 AM
: 6:32 AM
Agree. Cooking is good.
Fancy restaurants are supposed to provide a "dining experience" that justifies all that dough. My experience is that they almost universally fail to deliver sufficient experience/$ to make me feel like I absolutely needed to come back.
Fancy restaurants are supposed to provide a "dining experience" that justifies all that dough. My experience is that they almost universally fail to deliver sufficient experience/$ to make me feel like I absolutely needed to come back.
# posted by : 10:41 AM
: 10:41 AM
carl,
of course it doesn't have to be cooked all the time - take sushi for instance! or tartar beef? completely uncooked ground beef with raw egg yolks? or maybe you don't eat that in good old minnesota - viking food maybe!?
it's not about class my friend, it's about being open for new experiences. (even though i myself wouldn't sign to that a few weeks ago. long story so i won't go into it here).
you mis-spelled "existance" :)
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of course it doesn't have to be cooked all the time - take sushi for instance! or tartar beef? completely uncooked ground beef with raw egg yolks? or maybe you don't eat that in good old minnesota - viking food maybe!?
it's not about class my friend, it's about being open for new experiences. (even though i myself wouldn't sign to that a few weeks ago. long story so i won't go into it here).
you mis-spelled "existance" :)
# posted by : 12:28 PM
: 12:28 PM << Home
